Bosom Buddies

We'll always be bosom buddies

Friends sisters and pals

We'll always be bosom buddies

If life should reject you

There's me to protect you

If I say that your tongue is vicious

If I call you uncool

It's simply that who else but a bosom buddy

Will sit down and tell you the truth

Though now and again I'm aware

That my candid opinion may sting

Though often my frank observation might scald

I've been meaning to tell you for years

You should keep your hair natural like mine

If I kept my hair natural like yours

I'd behold but darling we'll always be dear companions

My crony my mate

We'll always be harmonizing

Orphan annie and sandy like amos and andy

If I say that your sense of style's

As far off as your youth

It's simply that who else but a bosom buddy

Will tell you the whole stinking truth

Each time that a critic has written

Your voice is the voice of a frog

Straight to your side to defend you

I rush you know there every time

The world makes an unkind remark

When they say they're a child

Is the world's greatest flush

It hurts me and if I say

Your fangs are showing mainful in your claws

It's simply that who else but a bosom buddy

Will notice the obvious flaws

I feel

It's my duty to tell you it's time to adjust your age

You try to be peggled

Between forty and death

But sweetie

I'll always be alice

Toklas if you'll be gertrude's dime

And though I'll admit I dissed you

I've gossiped and gloated

But I'm so devoted

And if I say that sex and guts made you into a star

It's simply that who else but a bosom buddy

Will tell you how rotten you are

Just turn to your bosom buddy

For aid and affection

For help and direction for loyalty love and for sooth

Remember that who else but a bosom buddy

Will sit down and level and give you the devil

Will sit down and tell you the truth

Love